How Do You Think of Mary?

 What are some of the things you know or remember about the Blessed Mother?

 These are some of the things that have been mentioned when I asked this question to different groups this week:

 Our Lady of Guadalupe

Jesus' mom

married to Joseph

visited by angels

impetus for Jesus' first miracle at wedding feast at Cana

intercessor for us with the Divine

a woman who understands other women's concerns

a woman who is confident

 To all this I would add that Mary can be seen as a strong, grounded, self aware woman. One who is, as one author states: "empty of arrogance and selfishness, and therefore open and oriented towards the Divine in her midst".

 When we look at all the many ways we have learned about the Blessed Mother in our past, it can be both confusing and overwhelming. It seems like each nation has a particular devotion to Mary under a different honorific title. Her appearances all over the globe are wonderful and opportunities to grow in faith and holiness for us. Her messages throughout the ages from Cana to today are constant: Listen to her son, look to her son, pray for peace. But to see her only in this light is often misunderstood by others outside our faith, they perceive us as worshipping Mary, as if she were another Divine being, perhaps the feminine face of God.

 There's so much more to how we understand Mary.

We believe Mary was utterly, fully and wonderfully human and it is in her humanity that she is blessed and we find our connection to her. 

 The story of the Visitation is a wonderful example of the friendship and love between two cousins, uniquely bonded by very unexpected circumstances. One young unmarried woman and one older well past child bearing years, both suddenly surprisingly blessed by God with pregnancies that will change the course of human history: John and Jesus. When we read between the lines in Luke, we see the story of the love and care these cousins have for one another. We know now that they depend on each other at this most critical moment of their lives for support, and understanding, for friendship and comfort. Who else could possibly know what each of them were going through but the other?

 Our own lives can get very complicated, can't they? We can see how crazy things can become just watching some of our TV shows: we might identify with "Hoarders" and then need someone like Marie Kondo to help us let go of stuff...she's made a fortune teaching people how to 'declutter' their lives!

 Mary can teach us how to declutter spiritually can't she?

If we keep Jesus in the center of our lives, and choose only those things and people that connect us to Jesus, then our lives are pretty focused, pretty simple, pretty peaceful. Then our hearts have a space in them to look for and recognize the divine around every corner.

 So much of our adult faith life can be reflected in our ability to recognize the divine. Having recently taken over the parish Instagram account, I find myself every morning actively looking for some photo that calls me to a deeper sense of prayer. Who would have imagined that Instagram would be a source of prayer? But that's what I mean...if, like Mary, we empty a space in our hearts-then there's room for the Divine to take root, be nurtured and grow within us. If we are open to looking for God, then we will eventually be able to see God everywhere. Mary can teach us to see:

 God in the set of empty swings in the park, that invite us to sit and relax a bit

God in the parent holding the hand of their little one, reminding us of the divine's care for us

God in the awesome beauty of nature all around us

God in the tears of a loved one

God in the laughter of a friend fighting cancer

God in the silly moments of a work day that make you smile

God is all around us, if we have the eyes to see

 Mary, our strong, capable, incredibly self aware Mother of God, Mary "untie-r of knots", release us from our anxieties,  Mary -one who brings God to us, Pray with us, pray for us, and help us be more like you, grant us the grace to see our God around every corner.

Living Your Faith-Simple? Tough? How Difficult is this for YOU?

 In Paul's letter to the Ephesians, which we'll hear this weekend, we are reminded that we are to live in such a way as to be true to our baptismal call in thought word and deed.

Let's remind ourselves that at our baptism we were called as "Priest, Prophet and King/Queen" to be loving and humble servants of God. We are called through those roles to share our faith, to act justly, love tenderly and walk humbly with our God, as the prophet Micah teaches us. We do this every time we bring justice, love and tenderness into our world by our actions. We know that this call to King/Queen-ship is a call to humble service to our neighbors. None of this is easy.

Often times I think that living our Christian faith is a rather difficult commitment to make. It means being conscious and thoughtful in all our actions, in all our words. All the time.

On the other hand, what I hear in this letter seems pretty simple. Imitate God. The reading spells it out pretty clearly: anything like bitterness, fury, malice and anger should not be a part of our lives. I will say that as an Italian who can be rather loud when excited, I might take issue with the "shouting" example...but for the most part we are to be compassionate, loving, forgiving and kind.

On second glance, maybe not so simple. Of course we want to be all those good and virtuous things, but sometimes, many times, it can be very hard to be that good all the time!  We might be tempted to give up before we even start!

 Who do you believe God to be? What is your picture of the Divine? Some of us were raised with a rather strict and forbidding image of a creator who was somehow always looking to grade us on our behavior. There was a divine checklist with our name on it, and we tried really hard not to have too many marks against us. Jesus' whole life he tried to show us a different image of his abba, his father...as one who loved us and wanted the best for us.

 So which image do you choose to hold onto? Because the image you choose will determine your behavior won't it? If we're called to imitate God's behavior, then it's important to know how we think God acts so we can decide on our behavior.

 Is your God angry, and mean and waiting to catch you when you make a mistake? Does your God take delight in punishing you?

 Or, as we see in the Christian Scriptures over and over again, is your idea of God that of a loving parent, one who is caring and compassionate, one who teaches and encourages, one who roots for you- rejoicing in your successes and gently comforting you in your times of loss or failure?

 "Be imitators of God", "Live in love" ... on my good days of course I want to behave like this! Even on my bad days, I want this to be my vision of how I want to live my life. We want to be, as John has reminded us these few weeks, Bread for others, so that all may be fed on and full of the best of God's love and care.

 Simply put, when Jesus said he was "living bread" he was offering us a true and real connection to our God. In accepting, in eating this bread from heaven, we become what we take into our very selves. We become imitators of God. We become people who live in love.

 Let's get it together, let’s start acting like we love one another! 

How Bread Makes Us One

 How many different kinds of bread can you name?

There's White bread, whole wheat, rye and pumpernickel. There's tortillas, rolls, bagels, croissants, na'an, pita and 'pandesal' (a favorite Filipino bread)

So this idea of bread is so important in every culture, we have lots of different types of and words for 'bread'. 

This story of the feeding of the multitude is so important in our history and tradition that versions of it appears 6 times in our 4 gospels. It's so important to John, the evangelist, that scholars say he uses this instead of the Last Supper story to give example of the Eucharistic meal: that Jesus feeds us both literally and figuratively.

What is different in Johns version of this story is that Jesus is the one taking the initiative: he wants to satisfy their hunger, he distributes the food, giving us a reminder of God's immense generosity. Thousands of years later, we can listen to this story and see how it is a glimpse of what is to come at the Last Supper: Jesus takes bread, blesses it and shares it with those around him...whether that's 5000 "men" or the 12 disciples gathered around that table.

 What does this mean for us today?

Whenever I reflect and pray about Eucharist I am always reminded of a question I heard so many years ago, that really haunts me: Am I a changed person, a different person, after I've received Eucharist? And if I'm not...why not?

 In John's account of this story, Jesus is seen at the service of his people. He recognizes their hunger, their need and looks to satisfy them.

Just like in the foot washing, we see a humble Jesus stooping to offer food to the crowd and kneeling to gather up the leftovers so nothing is wasted. And even though the story counts "5000 men" were fed, we know from the other accounts there were women and children there as well, even if they weren't counted, or in the eyes of some, "didn't count".

 Everyone mattered to Jesus that day on that mountainside.

He didn't discriminate between the folks who were there to hear him and the folks who were there looking for miracles:  they were all hungry and they all needed to be taken care of.

 What about us? How do we treat folks? I know we like to think we are welcoming and inclusive, both in our own lives and as a parish.

Some days we're really good at this aren't we?

Other days maybe we falter a little. Sometimes it seems to take a lot of effort to go out of my way to welcome someone at Church who I don't know.

Sometimes I can choose to be a real wallflower.  But oh! When I do get out of my own way and greet someone else, it's like the sunshine coming out after the rainstorm! The other person is so thrilled (most times!) to have someone recognize their presence and is happy to enter into the moment!

 Some days I just challenge myself to get over it...like at the lemonade stand when it's so much easier to catch up with the folks I already know, and miss for not having seen them in a while, but it's more important to say hello to the folks who are brand new and looking for a church home!

 Sometimes I ask myself what I'm afraid of...sometimes it is that someone looks mentally unstable and I should move to a different subway car, but sometimes it's just that someone dresses differently from me, or is playing music I may not really want to hear...but they're not doing anything wrong, so I need to check my attitude.

 I learned a lesson from a young man whose name I'll never remember, but whose story lives with me forever. I was volunteering in a small, poor parish (St Mary of the Angels in Egleston Square, one of the best parishes EVER!)  in the worst neighborhood in the worst neighborhood in Boston in 1987-8. Working with the youth group a young black teen explained to me that I would never understand what it was like to walk into a store and have security follow me around because it was assumed that I was there to steal something, not to shop. He's right, I'll never understand that. But I remember it every time I start to make an assumption about someone who looks different from me, and I pause to assess what I'm thinking and why I'm thinking that. Then I try to move on in a spirit of peace.

 And sometimes, because of what I've been taught along the way, I might just offer an affirmation to someone who crosses my path during the day: "love what your t-shirt says" or "what a beautiful color that is!" Most folks appreciate a compliment I'm learning.

 The story of the feeding of the 5000 can be seen as a foreshadowing of the Last Supper and the gift of Jesus' very self to us. Eucharist means we are all one in Christ. Do you believe that? If you do believe this - do your actions give witness to what you say you believe?

 May God help us be bread for one another today.

 

What Did He Say?

 Don’t you wonder why this crowd in the synagogue didn’t recognize Jesus' wisdom as he preached in front of them? The fact that they had known him his whole life should have been an asset, not a hindrance to their seeing and understanding his gifts and talents. I guess they could only see the poor carpenter in front of them, not the many he had become. From their privileged place in the synagogue, they could only look down on him. You and I certainly would have recognized Jesus' authority in our midst right? We never look down on those who are different from us!

Isn’t it also true that most times we just don’t see what we don’t want to see?

We are an anti racist church….at least that’s what our banner outside our church doors proclaims.

I’m very proud of the fact that we have this brand new banner, a gift from our Catholic Anti Racist Parish Collaboration partners hanging at our entrance. I posted a photo on Facebook. Within the first hour after posting on social media, someone from a former parish asked me, in private, why we needed to hang this declaration of our anti racist status. 

This is a really good question, and it opens the door for at least the beginnings of a difficult but much overdue conversation in our church. And I do mean OUR church of St Francis de Sales. Yes, we need to have this conversation everywhere, including with our family and friends. Sadly though we need to have this conversation in our church too.

In one of our earlier Pop Up Theology nights, I believe it was Dr Jeanine Hill Fletcher who spoke with us about racism in the church institution. Now I have been a church nerd my whole life and I want to believe that as often as possible my church has been on the right side of history. It is amazing to me as I think about this, that I have been compartmentalizing things my whole life to make this fit work. 

From the Crusades to the Troubles in Ireland and our current, constant warring in the Middle East, the HOLY LAND for Pete’s sake!! We have used religion as a weapon to hurt one another. 

Over the last few years and especially after the death of our brother George Floyd, and our sister Breona Taylor, we CHURCH were forced to face the reality of our corporate sin. We have been, for a very long time, a very racist church. The example that Jeannine shared with us absolutely shook me to the core. It was a story her mother told her, one that her family lived through while she was a youngster in Chicago. 

It happened that there was a house for sale in the vicinity of their parish church, somewhere in Chicago I’m going to guess this was in the late 50’s early 60’s….

The parish community was adamant that they didn’t want a Black family to move into the neighborhood, and so it was agreed that the parish would buy the house in order to prevent a family of color from doing so. Not only does this make me so incredibly sad, it makes me angry, ashamed and wonder why my parish in Wantagh bought that house on the corner just outside their property in the 70’s. Did we really need that extra building, or was something else at play?

Once that door is open, once I start to question what we’ve done in the past...well, then the ball is just rolling downhill...it’s not just about how we treat persons of color in our churches…

Someone was telling a story last week and mentioned that young persons seem to realize that the CHURCH has difficulty dealing with human sexuality in a healthy way…? Well THAT'S not a newsflash! Women in our church and in our civilizations are treated as second class citizens because NO ONE in our UNIVERSE has learned how to deal with human sexuality in a healthy way! Issues of gender and attraction and how we should dress and who we should love are more confounding to us now than ever. The church doesn’t get a pass on this...if we say religion has love, true love as its cornerstone, than we need to preach the truth that LOVE IS LOVE….and that’s it!

Scripture doesn’t say WHAT Jesus was preaching about that day in the synagogue. As I contemplate this, I’ve come to the conclusion that he was most likely saying something the assembly didn’t want to hear, something like GOD LOVES ALL OF US NO MATTER HOW DIFFERENT WE ARE FROM ONE ANOTHER ...and that was something they just weren’t ready to accept, and especially not from the carpenter's son.

A friend of mine posted something on FB that makes racism a bit more understandable: 

And I quote:

Imagine a guy who hates disabled people builds a hotel, so he banns all disabled people, and builds it in such a way as to specifically make access difficult for them. Years later he sells the hotel to a new owner who has no problem with disabled people. So you have a hotel where the owner has no problem with the disabled, and neither do any of the staff...however due to the actions of the previous owner, the hotel is still build in such a way that it doesn’t accommodate them (no disabled parking, no ramps, no extra considerations, etc) So although the people currently running it are not actively discriminating, they are operating a system designed to discriminate, and need to fix it even if they aren’t to blame for it.

It’s the same with racism. The discriminatory practices of the past still have ramifications today, and even if we aren’t  to blame for them we must recognize them.

As I understand it, this is what ANTI racism means. We acknowledge that this sin has been a part of our broken history...in our world and in our church, and we pledge that now that we know this, we will work to ‘fix our hotel’ if you will, change the way we act in the world: towards persons of color, towards women, towards the LGBTQ+ community….towards any one who we perceive as different from ourselves.

Is this easy, NO. But who ever said living out our Christian values was easy.

This gospel ends with Jesus being disappointed, stunned by the lack of faith of his community. So much so that he couldn’t work many miracles in their midst.

I am proud of our banner outside. My prayer for us is that this banner will lead us into the uncomfortable conversations that will allow our God to be proud of the people we are struggling to be, our best versions of ourselves, and that with our cooperation and faith, God will be able to create room for so many miracles for our world.

A Different Point of View

 Are you a beach person? I know I am! There's nothing like the beach to calm me down and help me sort out all that's going on in my life. The beach absolutely soothes my soul. Some writers have said that the sea is a 'liminal space', a place for growth and change. I know with every fiber of my being, that is true for me!

 I love when our gospel stories take place on a beach! Who doesn't like a boat ride after a long day of work? It's not by accident that Jesus invites his friends to "cross to the other side" of the water with him. This might remind them of their own ancestors crossing through the Red Sea in search of freedom from slavery. Might Jesus be inviting them to free themselves from the doubts and worries that bind them?

 We wonder, why did Jesus fall asleep in the boat...how tired was he? And why, as the trip got more treacherous, wasn't he up front helping his friends bail water out of the boat? How could he be so calm that he stayed asleep?

 It could be that falling asleep might be seen as the ultimate sign of trust in God-Jesus had no worries, he knew they would be OK. The fishermen disciples as yet, have no idea who Jesus really is, so how could they be expected to be calm? From their perspective, everyone was supposed to be working to save the ship....and this carpenter dude was not pulling his weight! They can be forgiven for their lack of faith, because they didn't yet understand.  It's OK if we're not always sure....it's OK if we're on the way...some days, most days, we don't fully understand. We are works in progress, just like those first disciples!

 Only God has control over the sea and the storm, so this is the dawning of the disciples understanding that Jesus is more than a good preacher...they see for a fleeting moment, the divine in him. Can you imagine how amazed they must have been? They must have been filled with awe.

Their amazement, though, needs to deepen into real faith. Like the mustard seed last week, time will help their faith grow.

 How many of us wonder what is going to happen for the Catholic Church in the days to come? For the last year and a half folks have gotten very comfortable sipping coffee on their couches on Sunday mornings and watching Mass on YouTube. Will we find a reason to go back to sharing Eucharist and worshiping together in a church building? Do we think we still need a parish community to help us live out our faith? Do we need the institutional structure that oversees the Catholic church? All really serious and important questions for us to ponder.

 God continues to be with us in our Church, despite our failings and sinfulness, even if we don't know what the future holds! Will the church of the future be better or worse than today? I hope with all my heart it will be better, stronger, more devoted to discipleship! We don't know, but in faith, we trust it WILL be here in some form and God will still be in charge!

 From where we stand on the other side of the beach, what is our perspective? Are we open to transformation, both personally and as a church community?  Are we filled with wonder and awe at what God can do, or are we afraid?

The story of Jesus falling asleep on the boat isn't about Jesus ignoring the danger around the boat, but rather, this story is about inviting us to 'the other side' so we can see both him and the world in a different way. From this new perspective, this new horizon, what do you see? Now that you've seen a glimpse of the divine, how will you live your life differently? 

Moments of Bliss

 I love the parables, I love imagining what “the kingdom of God” is like….but I must admit, I just thought that the kingdom of God referred to the idea of heaven….the idea of the ‘fullness of time’…but it seems I was wrong. Thanks to my friend Alice for encouraging me to look more carefully at the Scripture and what it might mean. According to scripture scholars the idea of the kingdom of God does NOT refer to a place like heaven, but rather a TIME when “God’s power for good is fully manifest in the world and evil is defeated”. In listening to the first parable our take away is that this kingdom of God grows most often when we don’t even know how, until, at some point we might see some of its growth or it’s fruit!

I try to imagine what that might be like, the best I can come up with is perhaps those fleeting moments of bliss when you have a sense that everything, for just this instance, is just right:

the warmth of the sun on your face after too many rainy cloudy days;

witnessing the laughter on your sisters face, the kind that makes her throw back her head and shakes her whole body, after so many years of sorrow;

the sense of peace and joy in your heart after a job well done or a day well spent;

 Part of the fragility of this idea is the knowledge that this peacefulness won’t last forever, at least not now, because this isn’t heaven (as my aunt used to say often). We learn to see and treasure these moments, recognize them as little bits of perfection, and hold them in our hearts. They strengthen us on the journey.

The second parable of the mustard seed speaks to us of the power of HOPE. We absolutely know that little things mean so much. We don’t often know, like ripples on the water when we skip a stone, we don’t know how even our smallest actions can effect others.

In trying to think of an example of this, I struggle. But that makes sense and proves my point: we DON’T know how our actions affect others….and that’s OK. Years later when someone said to me: “It meant so much to me when you came with me to chemo…” that’s a kingdom of God moment, isn’t it?

When I am the receiver of the kindness, well, that I can recognize…I know how lovely it was when a colleague brought me a glass of ice coffee, or a younger person offered me that last seat on the uptown local at the end of a long day. It makes me wonder if I ever did that for someone else?

As I struggle to find examples of Kingdom of God moments, I sadly recognize that it’s way easier to name the exact OPPOSITE of this: I can name easily moments of hurt and evil…whether I’ve been the one to commit the sin, or the one who was hurt by the sin of another.

When we speak badly about someone else’s character,

When we spread rumors or untruths,

When we engage in behavior that is hurtful to others

When we go out of our way to make someone else uncomfortable

When we don’t do an  honest days work

These are moments that reflect our broken humanity and our weakness, our sinfulness: the total opposite of what we long for in the kingdom of God.

Our challenge today is to live our lives in such a way that we celebrate many more moments of bliss, of love, and laughter, and fewer of those less than shining moments…

Luckily for us, God is all loving and merciful…God forgives us even when we hurt one another, if we are truly sorry. Do we even recognize the need for our own contrition and repentance?

The mustard seed is a parable of hope: we CAN grow and we CAN be better! Do we WANT to work towards that?

My prayer for us today is that we may create and celebrate many more Kingdom of God moments for ourselves and our world!

Go!!

Go therefore and make disciples of all nations!

Jesus is pretty clear in this gospel….there is not a lot of wiggle room...he orders his followers to GO OUT and share the good news with the world.

Thanks to the Spirit they received at Pentecost, they have the courage to do so.

 What does this mean for us in May 2021?

 I’m pretty sure none of us likes the idea of picturing ourselves as a street corner preacher in NYC ranting about “Jesus is coming, get ready!!” Type of thing…

 You’ve heard it said I’m sure many times, the best way to preach is by our actions, not by our words.

 We’ve reminded ourselves often, especially here at St Francis specifically, about the real way the Mass ends on Sunday: Go in peace, to love and serve the Lord...Go OUT!!

We’re not supposed to stay here in church all week, we’re supposed to live our faith, in our particular circumstances, we’re supposed to LIVE JESUS, on 96th St and beyond, by our example…

 What does that really look like in concrete terms:

 For the last year we’ve participated in Black Lives Matters protests in memory of George Floyd...faith in action looks like that!

 It looks like reusable straws that help protect our environment…

 It looks (and maybe smells…)like… composting….helping out in a community garden...

 It looks like moving over in your seat on Sunday to make room for someone else who’s just coming back to church again after a year of watching Mass at home, on line…or giving up your seat on the bus…

 It looks like a gentle conversation or a cup of coffee with someone who needs a break from caring for a loved one at home

 It can look like one friend listening to another when she’s just found out she’s lost her job...again…

 It surely means being involved and informed about elections and representation in community issues, even on “off year elections”...are you planning on voting on June 22? If not, why not?

What does it mean for YOU to LIVE your faith out loud? To LIVE JESUS in your part of the world?

Yes, living out our faith is hard, especially in a multi cultural environment-when everyone around us has the right and responsibility to live out their faith in their own particular way…

 A particular concern for us Catholics can sometimes be...do we know enough about OUR faith to be able to feel confident in a conversation with those of other faiths…? How many times with friends and family, do we feel like we are ill equipped to speak about what we believe, what Catholics do and why we do it? 

 If we feel like this...if we wish we knew more about the gift of our Catholic faith...what are we doing to better ‘equip ourselves’ for those conversations? When was the last time you read an article or attended a pop up theology gathering, or viewed one of the many many excellent videos on our media page? 

 So, I guess this gospel for Trinity Sunday lays down a challenge for us: if we are to Go out and share our faith with others...we need to know our faith better ourselves. We are so lucky that St Francis, our faith home, provides us with so many ways and opportunities to understand better what our Catholic faith is about and the many ways we can live and witness Jesus each day. With St Francis de Sales, Patron of journalists, as our patron and namesake, we continue to take advantage of each and every method of social media available to us, to learn more about and share our faith with one another and the world around us.

Today I invite you to take a look at something we’ve put up on our social media: an article on FB, a video on our website, challenge yourself to learn a little bit more today about what your faith means to you. Think about how you want to live your faith more authentically and...GO OUT and do it!

A Whole New World

 As we prepare to enter into our great celebration of Pentecost, and bring our Easter Season to its close, I'm mindful that we have much to celebrate as a church and as citizens of the world.

How wonderful was it to fully celebrate our Holy Week and Easter Liturgies this year, in person and in churches that are slowly and carefully beginning to fill up once again. Welcoming our neophytes over these last 50 days has been such an absolute joy.

Our cities and our states, towns and our world is cautiously, gently opening up again. We can stand a bit closer. We can offer a handshake or a hug, or at least a smile from behind a mask that is kept handy. We are beginning to feel like ourselves again, to feel human, to feel connected to one another at last.

Recognizing the gifts of the Spirit will be given to us once again this Pentecost, I find myself asking how do I want my world to be different as we emerge from these last 14 months of pandemic? How do I want to be different? I don't want anything, myself included, to go 'back to normal'. If I've learned anything from this experience it's that 'normal' wasn't all that healthy for me. I was too busy with things that perhaps weren't that important, and consequently neglected people and things that did matter. How can I choose better for myself and my community moving forward? 

Perhaps one of the gifts of the Spirit will be to help us discern as community and as individuals the best places to put our energies. This last year has helped us all examine what we say our values are and consider if our actions really do support what we claim we believe. Are there changes you want to make in your day to day life as we step into summer?

How will we stay connected to family and friends that we have rediscovered in these past months? How much time will I spend at work, and what time do I reserve for taking care of myself and those I love? Where does God and gratitude fit into my day? 

As we open ourselves up to the stirrings of the Spirit, I pray that we will each receive the gift or gifts we need in order to live our lives more purposefully in the days to come. Let's not 'go back to normal'. Who says 'normal' is so great anyway? Let's aim for EXTRAORDINARY LIVES!! 

Who Do You Belong To?

This August two of my nieces will leave their mother's home to go off to the far away lands of North Carolina and California to pursue college degrees. I am so proud of them. I am heartbroken for my sister, who will miss their daily presence in her life and home so much more than I can begin to imagine.

I think of this in relation to the Gospel this coming Sunday. 

We hear in this Sunday's Gospel, Jesus' "Priestly Prayer", where he prays that his disciples will remain united in spirit and love with him and the Father. He speaks of how they will survive as disciples in a world that may hate them, or hate what they stand for. He asks that they be consecrated in truth. What a beautiful pray this is, how poignant. 

I wonder if this isn't a prayer that parents might feel in their very souls each time their kids walk out the door and into what can certainly be a very big and threatening world? 

As a parish community we are ready now to 'send out' our neophytes, all those adults who were received into our community at Easter. They have finished their preparation, have been baptized and fully initiated, and they are truly one with us in faith. Some will move away, others will stay here in the parish. It is all our jobs now to welcome them into our ministries, masses, prayers and activities. 

Especially as we begin to gently open up our doors and hearts in a recovering post Covid world, we need to think about how we want to BE church again. What are we looking forward to? What would we do differently this time around?  I don't know about you but I really can not wait to see your smiles and be able to hug again!

When I think of that opening question: Who do you belong to? I know the answer is: we belong to God! But I know too, as a community of believers that we truly belong to one another as well! It is with that thought in mind that we want to say: 'it's time to come home to St Francis!'

We have been smart and safe during the last year and two months. Our church is clean, our staff is vaccinated, our pews are taped for safe distancing...and we can't wait to see you once more.

So, as soon as you feel comfortable doing so, please come home to church! We will welcome you with open arms (and air hugs!) 

These gospel readings we hear this week and next remind us that there are times when we must take our leave, but we always know where home is to come back to.

Welcome home!

Look to the Rainbow!

 I was having a conversation last Sunday with one of our parishioners about some of the particulars of our church architecture. It was fun to be able to point out the symbols of our patron, St Francis de Sales and the stories behind some of the stained glass windows.

So here's my question for you: Can you find the rainbow in our stained glass window in the sanctuary? 

Ever since I've been a kid, I've loved colors and I've loved the beauty of a rainbow, both in real life and in pictures. Color just helps me breath better. It make me feel calm and whole. Sometimes I'll go into Home Goods just to admire the way the set their displays according to color schemes. Still today, a brand new box of crayons can make me smile. 

All of which is to say how wonderful it is that in Genesis 9 we learn that God uses the symbol of a rainbow to seal his promise with his chosen ones. With the arc of the rainbow God reminds God self and all of humanity of the Creator's love for all creatures. God promises with that rainbow never again to destroy the world. 

It's hard to admit to ourselves that we have found way too many ways to do harm to one another in our history and in our present day. We have institutionalized racism, misogyny, and so many of our prejudices and hatreds. We don't need to worry about God destroying the world again, we're well on the path to doing that on our own. 

But there is, I have to believe, a goodness in our human nature too. There is a spirit of hope that keeps striving for peace and justice. Sometimes that spirit has a whole lot of ignorance to overcome, but when that happens, and someone is newly WOKE, watch out! Once we have seen and understood injustice, than everything in our souls calls us to work in big and small ways towards equality and justice, fairness for those who have been overlooked for so long. 

It's been a long year since Covid 19 hit our shores. In addition to a terrifying pandemic, we've dealt with a most divisive election season where we were shown how conflicted we are as a nation, and the Black Live Matter Movement that forced us to confront our complacency. That's a whole lot of hurt for us to deal with.

We can't go back to things the way they used to be. We have to be better when we come out on the other side of this pandemic.

How we do that is up to each of us. 

So, I'm encouraging each of us to look to the rainbow (can you hear the music from Finian's Rainbow?!) 

Let the rainbow remind us that God loves each of us: Black, White, Brown, Purple, all the colors of the rainbow, and that God loves us EXACTLY as we were created, in God's image! We don't have to be anything we are not, in fact, as St Francis de Sales said, we should "Be who we are and be that perfectly well!"

We might be a church that is 125 years old, but I'll bet we're the only church in NYC with a rainbow in its sanctuary window!! Can you find it? 

Are You Ready for a Covid Winter?

 How lucky are you? You're about to read a 'sneak preview' of an article that will next appear in our parish's January Newsletter. There's been a lot of coverage in the news lately about how adults and children are struggling to cope with the depression and anxiety that is becoming overwhelming as we move into winter months. We thought it would be beneficial to share this information with you sooner rather than later.

We are blessed at St Francis to have as one of our family, Dr Michael Fraser, who is a clinical psychologist in our community. In the following article he shares with us strategies for coping with the emotions that may come with the cold, dark,winter months in front of us. We also discuss how faith and prayer can be a balm to our weary souls.  

Entering Into the Winter with Hope

Science has shown that sunshine does much to improve our mood, our mental health.  As we move more deeply into these winter months, it seems wise to look for new ways to keep ourselves emotionally healthy as the days get colder, darker and for some of us, more difficult to manage.

Since last March we have been living in the shadow of Covid19. The effects of this worldwide pandemic, it’s sheer magnitude, how it’s changed what ‘normal’ is for all of us, is beyond our understanding.

Dr Michael Fraser, parishioner, dad, and clinical psychologist, joins us in this article to help give us some tools that might be useful as we wait out these winter days, in hopes of a new springtime yet to come.

Acknowledging that we are living in a time of uncertainty, understanding our stress and frustration is a good place to start, says Mike. The image of a backpack filled with bricks is helpful to visualize how anxiety can build up for us. Normal nuisances of every day can magnify to such an extent that our backpack can get way too heavy to carry. 

I talk to my kids, my patients and my students every week about being mindful of the seemingly ‘little’ things that can add up over the course of a day. For instance, on a personal note, street parking used to be more manageable...not so easy these days! Worrying about people standing too close without wearing a mask covering their mouth AND nose...what a bummer! I used to be able to teach my classes in a room full of students with whom I could interact ...now I have to separate my students, log on, fix WiFi issues, ask people to “mute” and “unmute” just to have a simple conversation...not so simple anymore. Each of these are bricks that end up in my bag by time I get home! 

If we take the time daily to acknowledge stress and ‘unpack our backpack’, that will go a long way in helping us cope. Moreover, it helps if we can ‘accept’ the fact that, as long as we are under the shadow of this pandemic, these same stressors will rear their heads. We call this “mindfulness.” If we don’t do this, the bricks will build up, our bags will get heavier and we will begin to show signs of irritability, fatigue, and our ability to manage the typical stresses of daily life becomes compromised. 

The mental health impact of COVID-19 centers around two main things: loss and worry. When we lose something important (e.g., a job, time with family, important life celebrations like graduation or birthdays without our friends, or simply a general sense of normalcy), we can expect to experience some form of depressive reaction. When things are uncertain (e.g., When will school return to normal? Is it safe to eat out? When can I visit and hug my extended family members again?), we can expect to experience anxiety. It’s important to know that depression and anxiety share many signs and symptoms, including but not limited to: sleep difficulties, poor concentration, irritability, quick temper, loss of motivation, and a desire to escape, which often happens through excessive use of negative coping activities (e.g., alcohol/substance use, video gaming, constant smartphone use). 

Jayne Porcelli: What strategies can we employ to help us cope with our feelings of anxiety or depression?

Mike Fraser: The first thing that comes to mind is to find something that you can control and go with that. The pandemic has taken away our control of so many things, so find something (safe and healthy) that you are able to control and do it. First, I recommend talking about your stress with a family member, parents, friends, colleagues or anyone you trust. It’s important to stay connected with others as best we can. Another thing I recommend--I have already spoken to many people who are doing this--is to make a list of things you want to do to develop yourself. This is especially important for young people. Find a hobby or an activity that does not involve simply staring at a screen (e.g., baking, drawing, dancing, learning an instrument, typing, exercising, learning a new language). Set a goal, make it a part of your day, and work towards that goal every day. This not only gives us a sense of control, but it will fill us with a sense of accomplishment. I told my own kids it would be a shame to be in ‘shut down’ mode with more time on our hands than ever and not emerge from this without growing in some important ways. If you need inspiration, I recommend the book The Master Plan: My Journey From a Life in Prison to a Life of Purpose, by Chris Wilson. This book is about a young man who went to jail at age 17 and made a ‘list’--his plan for self-development while he was in prison. His life was an extreme example of just how much one can accomplish, even when literally imprisoned. I hope this book can help us find perspective and motivation to make our own ‘lists’ for self-development, especially during a time when we might feel locked up.

JP: What does one do if he or she feels like they’re starting to obsess about some of this stuff?

MF: First of all, I think it’s difficult not to obsess about where we are and what is going on. Every time we turn on the TV, radio, or social media, we are bombarded with information about the latest COVID-19 stats on infections, hospitalizations and death. As humans, we are not built to absorb such a constant tsunami of bad news day after day. I would recommend taking a break from the news, especially at night. This is different from completely ignoring the news, which I don’t recommend either, because it’s important to be informed. This brings me to another recommendation. We should try to catch ourselves when we begin to say or do anything ‘extreme.’ Obsessive thinking is extreme thinking. Many of us are also finding that we are showing more ‘extreme’ emotions (e.g., sadness, irritability, impatience). This is completely understandable given what we’ve all been through. The concept of mindfulness, which I mentioned earlier, is about catching ourselves doing this. When this happens, we need to do our best to reign it in and perhaps take a moment or two to step away from a situation and take a breath (or do more focused relaxation breathing). 

JP: How does prayer help? Where does a faith life come into play?

MF: In my opinion, prayer, meditation and mindfulness share many things in common.

They all involve taking time to reflect on our lives, our emotions, our relationships, and our behaviors.

In general I don’t think we do that enough. Everyone prays in their own way and has their

own relationship with God. I think there is great emotional benefit from communicating in this way,

whatever the form of conversation. Setting a time every day to pray helps provide stability,

which the pandemic has certainly taken from us. Prayer allows us to express ourselves--the

positive and the negative--without judgment. An important part of prayer that is also very beneficial is

the act of giving gratitude. There is even increasing brain research on the health benefits when

we search for things in our lives to be thankful for. I believe very strongly, especially when there are

so many negative things going on in the world, in the importance of giving gratitude.

On a personal level, it has helped me greatly to take a step back when I get stressed or frustrated

to reflect on the people and the things in my life that support and enrich me.  

JP: Is it OK to be angry with God? (Asking for a friend…:-) )

MF: That sounds harsh, but I think God can handle it. We were created to feel all emotions and I believe it’s important to be true to our feelings by acknowledging them openly and without judgement. So many people have lost their jobs, loved ones and their whole way of life. With such tremendous loss I can’t imagine how one couldn’t be angry. As a psychologist, I have seen so many people stay stuck in depression, anger and anxiety because they never fully allowed themselves to express their full, true emotions. This also reminds me how important it is to recognize that, as humans, we can also hold multiple emotions simultaneously, and that they don’t necessarily cancel each other out. For instance, one can be angry at their parents and still love their parents. We can have an argument with our friend and still maintain our friendship. In my opinion, this is no different with God. 

JP: How do we hold on to hope?

MF: Staying positive in the midst of this pandemic has been and continues to be our greatest challenge. After our initial lengthy shelter in place, we appeared to be winning the battle against COVID-19 in NYC. Now we hear our numbers are rising again and there is constant talk about an “uptick” and a “second wave.” As I’m writing this, I just learned that my daughter will not be returning to in-person learning at her school until after the new year. She really enjoys going to school to see her teachers and friends, so that represents yet another hit. I am reminded about the Passion and how Christ was knocked down over and over and managed to get back up. How could He? How can we? We can follow His example, and we are reminded of this as we just celebrated the Christmas season. We can have hope that God put sharp minds on this earth to create a vaccine to keep us safe and healthy; hope that our amazing health care professionals can help us through this; and hope that our community of caring, compassionate neighbors will continue to support one other until we finally return to normal. 

Stay healthy everyone. And may God bless you all.

Don't Get in the Way of the Holy Spirit!!

 God is Good, All the Time....All the Time, God is Good....

We say it, we know it, we believe it, some days more than others, but I have to tell you, the Spirit, she is doing amazing things here at St Francis de Sales, and I am in awe of her power!

This past Sunday, the Feast of Christ the King, we had the absolute joy to celebrate the Rite of Acceptance into the Order of Catechumens (** a catechumen is one who is being instructed in the ways of our faith**) for four (4) women who have been journeying with us since the start of our pandemic reality. Two young women first knocked on our actual door in February, and have continued to attend our RCIA sessions via our Monday night Zoom. The other two women figuratively knocked on the door in the midst of these confusing days when the world is upside down, when we see only one another's eye's shining over masked smiles, when we can't hug, can't come into a church building without concerns for time and breath and air flow...these two women, after a few months of inquiry sessions also on Zoom, have asked us to welcome them into our faith.

Four unique women, single, engaged, married, moms, lawyers, artists, business women, educators seeking to follow the call they have heard from our gracious and loving God. They ask to be one with us in faith, at a time when they can't really come to Sunday Mass and worship with us in a safe and healthy manner. How will they get to know who we are? How will they come to understand what it means to be a parish family when we are separated from each other? I wonder how we can best reach out to them?

As we gathered this past Sunday afternoon for the Rite of Acceptance, three women came to church, with their sponsors, one was watching via our new livestream technology from her new home in Georgia. Who would have imagined that we would be connecting with her from such a distance! While we prayed and offered blessings for our catechumens here on 96th St, our sister in Georgia was blessed by and praying with her fiance. She felt connected to us in every way, especially each time we called out her name and waved to her through the new camera mounted under the choirloft. Technology can be such a blessing these days!

When we wonder, when I wonder, what difference does this all make in the lives of these folks, is when the Spirit, well, She goes into overdrive to make me understand how She works.

As we took time to reflect on the experience shared by these four women, each took the time to look deeply at what this ritual meant to them. They spoke of feeling enveloped in the love of God, the gift of taking time to look at and appreciate this call God has offered them, the wonder of taking the time now at this point in their lives, to answer this invitation from their creator. They spoke of tears of joy. They mentioned gratitude for knowing that this journey, while shared with their loved ones, is a journey of faith that is theirs alone. There was such a sense of awe for the mystery of this faith they seek. 

And can I tell you about their sponsors? Usually, in days when we're not fighting a global pandemic, we invite you, our parishioners, to step up and accompany these folks, in prayer and friendship. We ask you to be sponsors for them, a kind of church buddy, someone they can look to for help in getting to know how we live and pray and breath as Catholics. Sometimes it's as simple as sitting with them at Sunday Mass and helping them find their place in the missalette and showing them when to do our 'catholic calisthenics'...you know, when we sit, stand, and kneel...

Alas, we can't ask you this currently, because of safe social distancing. So, in lieu of your pastoral presence with them, we have asked some of their significant others, spouses, fiances, to step up and help them negotiate some of the ins and outs of our virtual worship. We did also invite two of our parishioners who have gone through this same process in the last few years, to step into the role of parish sponsor, albeit from a distance. All of these sponsors were so filled with the Spirit of God last Sunday, and so willing to help their 'person' experience all the love and blessings that God wanted to shower on them. I truly believe our new folks are in excellent hands.

So what is left for us to do as a parish community? Well, I would ask you to do what we do best...pray for these women, and for all our catechumens  who are preparing for sacraments come springtime. Did I mention we also have 4 brand new inquirers, MORE people looking to answer God's invitation to come and follow in the way of discipleship?

A final thought, since we can't gather together on Sundays to welcome and greet our catechumens. Perhaps as a special Advent practice you might consider writing a note of welcome to our new friends? If you're old school like me, it could be as simple as sending a card here to the parish addressed to "RCIA folks" 135 E 96th St, NY NY 10128...and I'll make sure to share your good wishes with them on Monday evenings. If you are comfortable on the computer, drop me an email, same label, "RCIA folks", to jayneporcelli@sfdsnyc.org and I will be happy to share with them. Either way, reaching out with a short note would be a fabulous way of letting these folks know that the parish is aware that they are here, they are with us, they are walking their faith journey in particularly trying times, and we care for and support them with our prayers and good wishes.

So, please keep: Crystal, Cesar, Leslie, Luke, Wendell, Angelique, Mica, Evie, Kristie and Adrian, Kristina, Katrina, Leah and Lucy in your prayers now and in the days to come. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide them and to be with us all as we walk together in faith. As we are so often  reminded these days, 'we don't know what the future holds, but we know WHO holds the future!" May the Spirit of God work through each one of us this Advent season to help the Kingdom come.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oftgdzric3c  click here if you'd like to see what our Covid Style Rite of Acceptance into the Order of Catechumens looked like!!

Pandemic World Sacraments

As we enter into autumn 2020 I'd be lying if I didn't say I feel like spring/summer was stolen from us. Living in NYC during a pandemic didn't allow for all the wonderful spring and summer activities we normally get to participate in. Having to be super cautious about where we went, how we interacted with people, meant not a lot of vacation time. Honestly, it has been mentally and emotionally exhausting. I think I'm stating what we all have felt one way or another. 

I'm extremely grateful therefore to say that these past two weekends at St Francis, we had the joy of celebrating sacraments with our young people. Last week was First Communion and this past Saturday was Confirmation.

This year's confirmation was unique in quite a few ways. Of course, first there was the whole pandemic reality that we needed to factor into how we would celebrate.

Then there was the preparation that this particular class went through in order to come to this day. This class was chosen to enter more fully into their process with guided service activities, prayer and work with some of our neighboring parishes and the chance to create relationships with some young adult sponsors in our parish. 

Finally, on a very personal note, this group of young people are the first group I began working with when I began in the parish seven years ago. Some of them, I've known since they were three years old! (that's another story) What an absolute joy and privilege it has been to work with them and see them grow into such fine young adults. Both Fr Kelly and I were a bit emotional about their Confirmation. We weren't the only ones...I saw quite a few parents quietly wiping away tears.

So, it is with great joy that we welcome these eleven young adults into our community as fully initiated Catholics. We are so proud of you, of who you are, and who you are growing to be as thoughtful caring adults. We know this world you are inheriting is not at all easy to navigate, and we promise to be here to support you. We love you and wish you all God's blessings. Thank you for your example to us. 

In the words of our patron, St Francis de Sales: "Be who you are, and be that perfectly well!" 

Smiling Eyes

Hospitality is a charism we are proud to value as much as we do at our parish of St Francis de Sales. In the past 6 years I have seen this community grow in amazing ways as we continue to look for ways to welcome new folks into our midst.

As we prepare to come back home to in person Sunday Mass this weekend, I find myself a bit nervous. Teasing apart the many reasons why anyone could be hesitant about coming into a building for a large group gathering I am surprised to find it's not the many health related cautions that are my concern, but rather, how to exhibit and share a warm welcome with others as they enter our church with our current restrictions. As you enter with your mask securely in place, and my mask on my face, we won't be able to see each others smiles. We won't be able to shake hands or hug.

In Sunday's Gospel Jesus speaks about how we are to receive one another as if we were receiving God's very self. "Whoever receives you, receives me and the one who sent me".

Maybe this is where we find our clue for how we are to receive one another this weekend.

When you come into the doors of the church tomorrow, I can look in your eyes and know we are gathered together once again as sisters and brothers in God's own heart and home. I suspect for all of us, the joy and anticipation we have about coming together as 'church' once again, will be bubbling over in our eyes and our hearts. Masks will not be able to conceal our happiness.

So, I have, we have, nothing to worry about. In fact, I think our disposition towards hospitality will find many new, creative ways to exhibit itself tomorrow and in the days to come.

As we reflect back over the past few months, we can take time to recognize and grieve for what has been lost. People we love, the ease of travel and access to people and places-how we think about all of this is different now. I encourage us too, to acknowledge and celebrate the many blessings we have discovered as a result of our months of solitude and prayer. We have learned to value the people around us in whole new ways... (or old, like when we were young, family dinners and games  again.) Let us bring both our sorrow and our joy with us as we gather together, both in person and virtually for Sunday Mass tomorrow. There may have been loss, but thankfully there have been blessings too.

I can't wait to see you tomorrow, especially your smiling eyes over your masks!

What Is Your Favorite Type of Bread?

This reflection might be difficult for some of you carb lovers who try so hard to be mindful of where ‘bread’ fits into your daily life;  Le Pain Quotidien as it were…

(A quick aside: we did all know that means ‘our daily bread’ right? Have to admit, that’s a clever name for a bakery!  And you know Corpus Christi means Body of Christ right? Not just the city in Texas...OK, moving on...)

It is no accident that Jesus choose bread as the sign and symbol that would unite and unify his followers. Think about what a universal symbol bread is. Every culture, every ethnic group has its own version of ...bread...white bread, italian bread, french bread, tortillas, matzoh, mantou (China), Naan, pita, puri….and on and on….! Jesus claims he is our living bread!
These days as Catholics who have been forced to stay away from our Sunday celebrations of the Eucharist, many of us have been thinking about how much we miss Communion, both the Eucharist and the time we have with each other at Mass. We have been called to think about ways in which we may be called to BE communion, to be the presence of God to one another, while we are both away physically from one another and at the same time, united in some most profound spiritual ways. We have been in awe and wonder as we realize that God has been present to us in the most amazing moments, if we have the eyes to see. In a very real way we are learning that all of life is sacrament and sacred. Where have you discovered the mystery of God in your life this week? 
Once you see the wonder of God around you, how do you let that change you? If we aren’t changed by our encounter with the Divine, what’s wrong with us? Shouldn’t we be changed in our very heart of hearts, if we truly are seeking God? And if we are changed, then our actions will reflect our change of heart, right? 

I had the privilege Tuesday evening of attending a gathering (virtually, of course) of churches united in their desire to work for the end of the sin of racism in our institutional church. These churches, from different areas of Manhattan, have met over the last few years to educate themselves and their parishioners, on the topic of ANTI racism. I am proud to say that St Francis de Sales has been a part of this endeavor as well. If you’re not sure of how we have been involved, I’d invite you to check out our video offerings on our website to see what so much of the focus of our Pop Up Theology has been. 
The conversation among the wisdom figures in this group quietly spoke to the level of exhaustion that folks are feeling at this moment in time. One person reflected on the image of a race, and said that this work may not be a marathon, but, in reality, more of a relay...with the idea that we need to learn how to pass the baton…
What do we need in order to take care of ourselves when we are exhausted? We need nourishment! In this instance, the food we need, so clearly, is the Living Word of God in our midst, shared with one another. We need to fill ourselves with the truth that we are sisters and brothers, children of one God, who loves all of us, indiscriminately. We are called to be that living bread for one another. We are bread for the world. We are called to stand shoulder to shoulder, arm in arm, (OK, ideologically, if not physically because of social distancing!) and witness to our unity in Christ Jesus.

There are lots of ways to do this, not everyone is called to or feels comfortable just now, in joining a march. That’s perfectly understandable given the last three months of Covad restrictions. Be at peace! 
There are other options available to us; ways to reach out to the lonely, the elderly, the sick, and let them know they are not forgotten. These are days we may choose to make peace with someone we have been estranged from.  We can share what we have with the hungry. We can’t all do everything, but we can all do something!

May Jesus inspire us to be food for one another today. May we be changed by our encounter with our very own Living Bread! May we, in Jesus' name, look for ways to build up and nourish each other, and stand united as witness to all that is good in our world.

The Mystery of Relationships

This coming Sunday we celebrate the feast of the Trinity. Sister Joseph Anita, CSJ was right...it is a mystery. But lots of things are mysteries to me (math for one....) so I'm comfortable with not understanding all of the finer points of this doctrine. What I heard yesterday in a reflection on this topic sticks with me right now: Trinity is about relationship. The loving relationship between the Creator, the Son and the Spirit.

Relationships are vital to our lives as human beings. We grow in community with one another. We thrive in the light of the love we share, the friendships that feed our souls.

Our world is hurting today. Could it finally be that we have reached a breaking point? Are we at last ready to admit that we have failed to care for each other as sisters and brothers in Christ's love?

Racism is a sin that destroys, crushes, kills.

We are called, as followers of Jesus Christ, to live in the light, to speak truth, to love one another.

Any time, in any circumstance, when we treat others as less than ourselves, because they are different from us, we are guilty of the sin of racism. (Or whatever -ism applies in that circumstance)

Really, it's that simple, isn't it?

We've all learned the 'golden rule' treat others as you want to be treated...love one another...
We have found a million ways in our world not to do this.

Oh, consciously we may try, or think we're trying to treat others equally, fairly. Many times, the truth is we are not aware that unconsciously we have all sorts of unknown biases that live in our hearts.

Here is a really small example that was pointed out to me this week: why are 'flesh colored' band aids the color of my particular skin tone? Really small example, huge repercussions.

I am challenging myself this week and moving forward to pay attention to all the many ways the choices I make may break/harm my relationships with my brothers and sisters in my world. I want to be a better Christian Catholic. I want to honor my God by honoring those in our world who have had to fight for fair and just treatment by the majority for the last 400 years.

I invite you to think about your relationships, on this Trinity Sunday, and think about what you want them to be.  May we all strive to make our relationships with one another holy and whole in the light of our Savior.